Why Lie?

I think there is a real deficiency in America. Not of vitamins and minerals, but of honor and integrity. Of giving your word, and your word actually meaning something. Of saying what you mean and meaning what you say. And, in the end, doing what you said you'd do.

As I ponder the dire state of America, political corruption, shady business practices, dishonest personal relationships, I realize something. Honesty, integrity, and trustworthiness begin here, with me. If a difference is to be made, I have to look inward. If necessary, I must change myself before attempting to change my family, neighbor, friends, community, and country.

One of my pet peeves is Lying. You can do alot of things to me, but don't lie! I have no tolerance for it. It disgusts me. To me, lying is the root of almost every problem in the world. Big lies, little lies, tiny white lies, dancing around the truth lies, out and out deceit lies, half truth lies, even lies we tell ourselves. Lies cover the truth, clouding it, disguising it, making the truth difficult to find, and at times, lost forever.

I have always thought of myself as an honest person. But as I reflect, I wonder if I am as honest as I would like to believe. How many times have I said I was going to do something, but never followed through? Like, when I told my friend I'd call her later today, but didn't. Or told my kids we'd get ice cream, but never made it to the ice cream parlor. Some would say those aren't really lies, or are so minor, they don't matter. But, if we're going to be honest, we have to realize that a lie, is a lie, is a lie. No sugar coating it. Placing conditions on it won't make it go away, or make it any less of a lie. It's time to get honest with ourselves.

Now, there are valid reasons that make it impossible to follow through on everything. I realize that. But, in my opinion, it has gotten far too easy for people to fall into the pattern of saying they'll do one thing, and then doing quite another. Have you ever met a Forgetter? You know, the person who repeatedly uses the words, "I forgot," as an excuse? Doesn't it make you wonder if she actually did forget or just chose to do something else? Even more concerning is the abuse of the words that usually follow right before or behind them... "I'm sorry".

The phrase, "I'm sorry", is incredibly beautiful and holds the potential to actually mend and heal. But when used redundantly, the words lose their effectiveness and meaning. So, why do people abuse the words, "I'm sorry"? Could it be to take the pressure off of the person apologizing, and place it onto the person receiving? In other words, to get someone "off your back". Or to cover an awkward moment?

To me, an apology is only real if it is offered sincerely, expresses true remorse, is followed by a positive action, and does not have to be repeated down the road. Have you ever noticed that a true apology has an almost magical effect? More often than not, the apology is accepted. Sometimes an apology is even offered in return. It is really quite amazing and miraculous! And, I believe, it just goes to show that people are truly forgiving, kind, compassionate, and understanding by nature.

Which leads me to my question, "Why lie in the first place?"